In my first few months in my current role, I was asked to visit a church whose youth work was in crisis. Things weren’t going to plan and after ten years it looked like it was going to have to close. With the innocence of a person just starting out, I asked, ‘What difference does it make that the church is running the project, not the council?’ I was somewhat astounded to be told that the church was very keen that their faith should make no difference to the project. My blunt reply was that perhaps they shouldn’t run the project, and sadly within a year it closed.
This extreme example aside, we often see big differences in theology between churches and projects, but sometimes they can simply be about our prejudice and preconceptions, and not about reality. Churches that come from vastly different traditions and styles still agree on huge amounts, but all too often we focus on the small differences. My advice would be that you shouldn’t assume that the church down the road holds particular views because someone told you 15 or so years ago. So, what should you do?
Have a conversation
Whether or not you end up working together, a conversation is a good thing. Talk about what the nearby church is doing, with the nearby church itself, not just your own church. Find out what its aims are. It is also good to find out the basics so you can work around this. Working together might be a step too far, but talking to each other should be acceptable. Also you might be surprised – sometimes the rumours of what is going on down the road are just that: rumours.
Find out what you agree on
It can be tempting to jump straight into what you disagree on. I would try to avoid this early on. A good start might be to explore what you believe young people mean to God. Or you could talk about the needs of young people in your area. You could explore what would be considered good news for young people, and how both churches could meet those needs.
Work out a plan
Having found out what you agree on, and perhaps some areas that you disagree on, you need to have a plan for how you are going to work together. Pray together. Try to discern God’s voice in the conversation. God might have something to say. Never forget that we are all part of the worldwide Church, so we are going to work together on some level…
Churches that come from vastly different traditions and styles still agree on huge amounts, but too often we focus on the small differences
Plan A
If it has gone really well, and it turns out that you don’t disagree on as much as you thought you did, you could try starting a joint youth group. This is complex and requires constant communication between the church leaders, youth leaders and parents. Which church the young people ‘belong to’ will need to be explored, and discipleship might be a problem. The group may well need its own identity, but who is ultimately responsible is an important question (particularly when it comes to insurance and safeguarding policies). A joint group is often better run as a separate legal organisation, set up and insured in its own right, which is no small undertaking!
Plan B
If you realise that you share a love for Jesus, but express it in different ways and with different secondary beliefs, it might be simpler to work together by forming different groups but holding joint events (socials or worship celebrations) on an occasional basis. This can work between two groups, but often a town-wide, multi-group approach can be good. Why not phone up a few group leaders and work together to do something you couldn’t do apart? In the joint meetings, focus on what you agree on. Why not explore what it means to follow Jesus in 2015 by collecting food for the foodbank or tidying up the park? Or get a speaker to talk about loving God and loving your neighbour. There is plenty of challenge there without exploring anything too controversial.
Plan C
If you think that meeting together as a group would be too difficult – either for cultural/ style reasons or for theological ones – then you can still do something as leaders. I often find that leaders who meet together for a time to pray can agree on some joint activity. Praying with and for one another is a great place to start, and God often changes us as well as changing others. It might be that in the conversation about the needs of young people in the area there are two distinct groups: one church might see the needs of young people that meet at the skate park and the other the needs of young people in the school. You could simply agree to divide your resources and have one church work with each group.
Plan D
If your conversation is a complete disaster, commit to praying for the people in the church nearby. Even if you disagree on huge numbers of fundamentals, there is nothing worse than fellow Christians being rude about one another. There are enough young people who don’t know God; we don’t need to fight over those that do. A church or group that feels the need to belittle the church nearby in order to make themselves appear better is not attractive to young people (or anyone, for that matter). Commit to prayer and to not speaking ill of your brothers and sisters!
