For once however we managed to find some gold among the shambles of having to make a few last-minute changes to the programme: we invented a hilarious game! I guess it wasn’t really a new invention: as you know there are probably only four games that are played in children’s and youth groups and everything else is a variation on the main four, but we did invent it there and then for us! We spread the kids out around the horseshoe, sat on the chairs; there were more chairs than children and so we had gaps with empty chairs in them. Next, using the dice we found in the Easter story reflection resources, we let the kids take turns in throwing them and moving round the circle the corresponding amount. The rules were simple from there, if someone was already in the chair you were supposed to sit in you sat on them! Once you’d been sat on you stayed together with that person hoping to sit on more people until all the children were in one large tower and the winner was the child at the top.
Two things became apparent very early on: first no one cared who won, and secondly the game was absolutely hilarious. I mean it was so funny, so funny, we leaders to recover composure, let alone the kids. As a result it was an outstanding session which will be remembered for years to come as the one where literally the whole group sat on little Matthew. But was the session faith forming, or was it just a bit of fun that covered up the fact I was having a crisis with the way the room was arranged?
I would argue that it was massively faith forming and hugely important. I’m just back from a conference where many of the speakers seemed to be queuing up to see who could deliver the most dramatically challenging statement about the spiritual development of a child: “There is no children’s version of the Holy Spirit, we should expect our children to see miracles”; “Children are especially powerful in the prophetic; we must release them into it”. We were given all manner of powerful sounding phrases we should “speak over our children”. But in the face of all of this the timeless fact remains that there is no more powerful tool to form the faith of a child than a Christ-centred community, where they are known, loved, held and included as equal members. A huge part of being a community together is that we play, laugh and enjoy being with one another. Through this we form memories of particular moments that make us chuckle to ourselves when our mind wanders onto them and help us remember that group of people who love us deeply. I’m not saying that we give up on praying with our children or encouraging them to aspire to be all that they can be in God, but I am saying that being in community is a deeply spiritual practice too and one that is easily missed.
My boss (I use this term loosely as there a few stages between me and him) the Bishop of London has just retired and in his final address to the diocese he said this: “What the Church has to offer is not an ideology or a mere critique, but a community in which the spirit of Jesus Christ dwells. In a market place of strident salesmen of warring ideologies we seek not to add to the din but to build relationships that endure and give meaning to life.”
Being in community is a deeply spiritual practice and one that is easily missed
I thought this phrase was so important for us as youth and children’s workers. Often our focus is on getting through the material, keeping behaviour managed and making sure we scramble enough leaders to satisfy the safeguarding officer How often do we focus on building those relationships that endure and bring meaning to life and are the hallmarks of the community where the Spirit dwells?
I’m convinced that good ministry among children is really about getting a series of small things right that can transform a group, rather than an amazing and dramatic change that you often struggle to press home for more than a few weeks. Forming community is a powerful thing but there are no magic fixes for it, you have to work at it, do lots of simple things well and remember that it’s really important to have a good laugh pretty regularly.
