Everyone who comes to church on a Sunday morning should be able to encounter God and worship - whatever their age, experience or ability. So how do you do this? Some services have something for everyone but many churches choose to separate children from adults with specific activities for different age groups. Smaller churches might group all children together but some divide them into age specific groups. The under-5s are often thought to be the most difficult age group to accommodate. However, there seems to be a growing desire to ensure that whatever is provided for them enables them to worship, rather than just remain occupied while everyone else worships.
A community of faith, according to John Westerhoff, cannot be built. Instead, it evolves, and has several key elements. Firstly, there is a common story, and it is important to share it together; this is often retold by the elders. It is essential to have a variety of ways for people to enter into the story and learn, as everyone is different. There is a common authority which comes from reading scripture and praying, but also from tradition. There are common rituals; humans are ritual beings and many rituals in worship come from tradition and scripture. Finally, there is a common way of life; worship should inform how you live, and how you live should inform how you worship. If children are separated from the service then careful consideration needs to be given to how they can feel as though they belong to the worshipping community and its common ways.
THE IMPORTANCE OF SPACE
A good way of enabling young children and their families to still feel part of the worshipping community is to create an area within the main body of the church. This gives them a space to go to and have the freedom to move in while still being involved with the service. Ideally, the area should be near the front so everyone can see and hear what is happening. This enables people to share in the common life: story, authority and ritual.
Space is important because children are aware of their surroundings, how things feel and the signals given by the environment. Often the places in church where children’s ministry takes place do not easily lend themselves to a sense of ‘God is here’. They are often multifunctional spaces like the hall or a meeting room, or they may have a classroom feel. Think about the space; does it say big area for running, playgroup, toddlers, meetings or learning? Now think about church, what feel does the space have? Hopefully one of worship, mystery, awe and wonder. To recreate a similar feel, think about the differences: cross, candles, smell, special items, icons, etc and consider how you can make the space a sacred space. Space is not just the physical space but also a safe space to be yourself and a space to be with God. Silence is important too, space to think, explore and worship.
Intimacy is not necessarily about creating a small, intimate space but a space where children feel safe. People can feel close to God on top of a mountain. Frequent change of leaders can affect intimacy and lessen the opportunities to build community within the group. This can be linked with trust too. It can be difficult for trust to develop if there is frequent change, both with leaders and with God.
There are a few difficulties with having a separate space that need to be considered:
AT WHAT AGE DO YOU ACCEPT CHILDREN?
WHAT IS AVAILABLE FOR THE YOUNGEST CHILDREN IF THEY REMAIN IN CHURCH?
DO PARENTS LEAVE THEIR CHILDREN?
WHAT HAPPENS IF CHILDREN DO NOT WANT TO BE LEFT?
WHY WOULD PARENTS MAKE A HUGE EFFORT TO GET TO CHURCH, TO THEN GO OUT?
WHAT OPPORTUNITIES ARE THERE FOR CHILDREN TO SEE AND LEARN FROM THEIR ELDERS AND ROLE MODELS?
HOW DO THE CHILDREN LEARN THE TRADITIONS AND RITUALS OF THE CHURCH?
Conscious effort is needed to ensure the space, leaders and contents of the room are all designed to nurture children’s spirituality. It is also important that there is opportunity for the whole community to come together, share the common life, hear the common stories and learn the common rituals and common authority. Everything you do and provide for children and their families should be conscious and there because it has a purpose, not just because it has been donated or it has always been that way. Everyone is equal and valued by God; we are all created and loved by God and made in his image.
CAREFUL CONSIDERATION NEEDS TO BE GIVEN TO WHETHER OR NOT CHILDREN FEEL THEY BELONG TO THE WORSHIPPING COMMUNITY
THE PLAY AREA
So how are these all accommodated into one space? It is important that there is enough space to move around in, to dance, and to crawl. Do not fill the area with furniture and things which clutter the space. It also needs to be a safe area, preferably carpeted or with a large rug. This will also help to eliminate unnecessary noise when items are dropped on the floor. Consideration then needs to be given to the items in and around the area. It is good to include items which are complementary to the worship and service.
THE BARE NECESSITIES
Some basic items should always be part of a worship play area to help stimulate the imagination and use different senses:
• Different pieces of fabric with a variety of textures
• A variety of different objects made from natural material like sponges, rope, leaves, wood, metal
• Dressing-up clothes or pieces of material
• A selection of crosses
• Wooden building blocks and shapes
• Wooden people
Remember they do not all have to be expensive - ask members of the congregation if they may be able to help with items they have at home or with sewing or woodwork. Providing items made of natural materials rather than plastic helps to highlight that the area is special and different to home (a lot of children’s toys tend to be very bright and plastic).
THEMED BAGS OR BOXES
In addition to the general items you could have themed bags or boxes. In these you could include toys for the theme or puppets to retell the story, books, a sensory tub, craft things and games to play. Bags or boxes could have an individual theme, like prayer, or be based on a particular type of service, like a Eucharistic service. The Spiritual Child Network has ideas for liturgy boxes on their website; these are great for children to follow the service in their own way. They can be used in church among the congregation or in a specific space. See their website for more information spiritualchild.co.uk For themed boxes or bags include items which stimulate imagination, awe and wonder, and which tie in with the service and building around them. It is important to consider a child’s development and abilities and accommodate all ages from babies upwards.
There are many other stories which can be explored in different ways too. Include smaller items of the things they will see around them, like the altar, font or people. There are different types of model churches available, from fabric ones, wooden ones and Playmobile; all enable children to explore them for themselves. Young children use role play a lot and imitate what they see, so it is important that they are in a position to see, copy and explore. Festivals and the Church year offer another opportunity for various themes; Advent, Christmas, Lent, Easter, Ascension, Pentecost, Harvest, Remembrance and All Saints are a few examples.
PRAYER
An important aspect of the space is an area for prayer; opportunity to offer individual as well as group prayer including please, thank you and sorry prayers. Here are some prayer station ideas:
IT IS IMPORTANT THAT THERE ARE OPPORTUNITIES FOR THE WHOLE COMMUNITY TO COME TOGETHER AND SHARE IN THE COMMON LIFE
Prayer tree with paper leaves
Washing line with paper clothing and pegs
Fishing net with paper fish
Paper stars on black paper
For intercessional prayers you could create a box of items or pictures for the children to choose from, such as:
A small globe
Transport like car, bus, lorry, tractor
People of all ages
Plants or trees
Rainbow or umbrella
Water
Food
Toys
Someone sad or crying and someone laughing
Pictures of areas or people in the local community
Invite the children, if they are happy or able to, to say why they picked what they did. It might just be because they liked it!
These could all be used for please or thank you prayers. Saying sorry could be another area. White boards, chalk boards or sand can be used to draw something on, to represent how forgiveness is needed. Each can be wiped clean showing forgiveness. Other ways to do confession include water; washing hands, placing a fizzy vitamin c tablet in to water and watching it dissolve, or writing on acetate with water soluble pens then dipping it into the water. Each represents cleaning away and a new start. These are concrete ways of demonstrating a difficult concept.
It is important that whatever is offered for children and their families within church enables people to worship and encounter God. Being part of the service enables people to hear stories, learn rituals and know traditions. Being within the main body of the church will enable people to feel as though they are part of the wider community, to learn together as a community, to worship together as a community, and to grow together as a community.
