January is typically a time for setting goals. However, setting spiritual goals is actually very hard, as it is tricky to measure success; how do you make being more compassionate an achievable target? Or ‘praying more’ non-legalistic?
What you can do however, is make goals around the skills that help you become better at those things. Try to be as specific as you can. For example, ‘This year I will get out of bed early enough to read my Bible three days a week,’ or, ‘This year I will give away at least £2,000 to charities I’m not connected to.’
Be realistic as well as aspirational: set short, mid-term goals that will be a stepping stone to where you want to be, goals that will fill you with motivation as you hit them and that you can increase as time goes on. What good is there in setting goals you are almost certain to fail at, leaving you disillusioned and full of guilt for no reason?
Longer-term goals can be more vague and inspirational; these should always be out of reach and feel a bit unachievable. Shorter terms goals should always lead you towards these bigger ones.
For your mentee:
Feel free to talk frankly with your mentee about the process of setting goals and resolutions / resolve this year, rather than just the content of those resolutions.
• What motivates and helps them to succeed? Deadlines? Excitement? Doing it with others? A challenge?
• How do they respond to failing and breaking resolutions?
• Out of ten, how committed are they to succeeding?
• If it is not ten, should they even attempt it?
For you:
• What are your goals as a mentor?
• How can you improve as a listener?
• How much time do you want to spend planning for each session?
• How many mentees do you aim to mentor?
• Out of ten, how committed are you to your mentees?
• How committed are you to improving as a mentor?
‘If you really want to do something, you’ll find a way. If you don’t, you’ll find an excuse.’ Jim Rohn
Joel Toombs has spent more than ten years in youth work and has an MA in Christian mentoring. See grovebooks.co.uk for his booklet, Mentoring and young people.
