It’s that time of year again. It’s been in the church’s calendar and the subject of extensive planning for the last year: the intensive Christian faith-focussed, week-long holiday. It has bright lights, colourful tents and flags, a flashy programme and wonderful worship. The children’s programme is like a week-long children’s party, packed with fun, worship, prayer and stories about Jesus. There are hundreds of children and hundreds of adults teaching and modelling what it means to follow Jesus. It’s a wonderful time of the year, a highlight for so many.
It’s on this week long Christian holiday that Poppy, aged 7, says she asked Jesus into her heart. This is great; we know Jesus wants to meet with children, but suddenly, out of the festival crucible, Poppy’s decision to follow Jesus has to matter in the real world. So what should we do as children’s workers after the festival?
Celebrate
The first thing to do when a child decides to follow Jesus is to celebrate. It is a miracle; it is by God’s grace and the work of the Holy Spirit that people come to faith. When we celebrate a child coming to faith it should fill our hearts with thankfulness and cause us to worship God. It is incredible that God calls people to follow him, to experience love and forgiveness and to know they have a life of purpose. In scripture we see individuals meeting Jesus as well as seeing thousands at a time coming to faith; each life given to following Jesus is worth celebrating. Whether children decide to follow Jesus when they are praying with a parent or in the weekly children’s ministry in the local church or on the annual church holiday, we must celebrate.
There are different ways to mark when a child comes to faith; this marking is not ‘just’ a celebration, it’s part of the discipleship journey. Those who came to faith in the New Testament were baptised: the Eunuch on his way to Jerusalem and the family of the jailer in Acts 13. There is both the more formal and public sphere and the informal and smaller community / family space where celebration can take place. The more formal and whole church faith celebration comes in the form of baptism and confirmation which celebrates a coming to faith or confirmation of faith. The informal way to celebrate may be through testimony or story telling in the children’s group, or among a small group within the group. Any of these options should be in line with your church tradition and a conversation may need to take place with those in leadership. The options available will also need to be decided by the child or parents. The chance to celebrate allows God’s story to be told, builds faith in everyone who hears the testimony and marks an important milestone in a child’s faith and life.
But what comes next? How do we disciple children who decide to become followers of Jesus? In my opinion, discipling children who decide to follow Jesus on the annual church holiday comes down to two things: relationship and empowerment.
Relationship
With Jesus
The annual church holiday is a brilliant faith and life-building experience for many and a great way to ‘top up’ the faith of many Christians across the UK. But it doesn’t always reflect the day-to-day, week-by-week activities of the local church and real life.
Discipleship is about relationship. Children who decide to follow Jesus decide they want to have a relationship with Jesus. Discipleship is about relating to, following and imitating Jesus. With that in mind it’s helpful for children’s workers to not have to worry about bringing back the larger than life party atmosphere. It’s too much work and expense in any case. Of course fun and games have their place in children’s sessions, church and family. But going back to basics means the central part of discipling new disciples is about encouraging and enabling the children to encounter and follow Jesus in every area of their lives.
The first place to start to enable children to encounter Jesus is in the children’s teaching sessions. Is there a need to re-vitalise the teaching material, by taking some things out to make more room for children to encounter Jesus? Maybe there is a need for more sung worship, more time for creative prayer or more time to reflect and discuss the story? Like the rest of life, sessions for teaching children on Sundays can be packed with great stuff and non-stop activity, but is that really enabling children to encounter Jesus and grow as disciples?
If revitalising doesn’t seem ambitious enough, then there may even be an opportunity to run specific discipleship material that goes back to the basics of the Christian faith which will help any new disciple work out how to live out their new relationship with Jesus. The material could include sessions on Jesus, the Bible, prayer and worship.
David Csinos, a leading theologian specialising in children’s spirituality, suggests that children who are given the right time, space and open questions can and do like to wrestle and create their own theology. This in turn leads to children growing up better spiritually. This model of nurturing faith goes against our tendency to ensure children have the correct answers but it will allow children to develop their own relationship with Jesus
With family
Discipling children after a church holiday is also about relating to the whole family. Families First suggest that the majority of parents think they ought to be the primary disciplers of their children but few of them feel equipped sufficiently. In fact, they believe the Church is in a better position to disciple children. Discipling children must include relating to families and empowering them to disciple their own children.
There are some simple things to try to bridge the gap between church and home and to help nurture faith in the family. A monthly newsletter to families could be a great way to start communicating what children are learning during children’s sessions so they can continue the conversation at home. The same newsletter could suggest things to buy or try at home which will grow faith and allow whole families to encounter Jesus. This could range from new Bible story books, the latest music to play in the car or at home, or whole family activity books to do on a Saturday morning. You could also suggest activities like going on prayer walks or serving at a local charity. If a newsletter doesn’t feel appropriate, then a little note to take home after each session to tell the parents what the children have been learning and an activity to try together or a few questions to discuss could work. Alternatively, if a take-home craft includes a Bible verse and / or an explanation of the truth being communicated in the children’s sessions, this will allow families to start discipling at home by discussing what their child has been learning in the session.
A final way to disciple children through enabling families is by feeding back after sessions. Parents love to know if their child include relating to families and empowering them to disciple their own children.
There are some simple things to try to bridge the gap between church and home and to help nurture faith in the family. A monthly newsletter to families could be a great way to start communicating what children are learning during children’s sessions so they can continue the conversation at home. The same newsletter could suggest things to buy or try at home which will grow faith and allow whole families to encounter Jesus. This could range from new Bible story books, the latest music to play in the car or at home, or whole family activity books to do on a Saturday morning. You could also suggest activities like going on prayer walks or serving at a local charity. If a newsletter doesn’t feel appropriate, then a little note to take home after each session to tell the parents what the children have been learning and an activity to try together or a few questions to discuss could work. Alternatively, if a take-home craft includes a Bible verse and / or an explanation of the truth being communicated in the children’s sessions, this will allow families to start discipling at home by discussing what their child has been learning in the session.
Children who are likely to stick with their faith and grow as disciples are people who have been enabled to see their purpose and contribute to something bigger, rather than just being entertained
A final way to disciple children through enabling families is by feeding back after sessions. Parents love to know if their child was good, whether they listened and so on. But what is more helpful is answering any of those questions with encouragements about how their child is doing spiritually: “Yes, Harriet was good today and she prayed a great prayer at the end when we were praying for the world,” or: “Yes, Jonathan listened brilliantly and he loved singing the worship songs.” By telling stories of children’s spirituality, parents are more likely to engage in this area of their child’s experience in church, their encounter with Jesus and ultimately their discipleship.
Empowerment
Discipling children is not just about relationship but is also about empowerment. When the disciples were following Jesus around they weren’t just encountering Jesus and being taught, they were challenged, pushed to use their gifts and develop more skills to take part in God’s mission to grow his kingdom.
A few simple things can bridge the gap between church and home
Shane Claiborne, an activist and theologian, suggests that young people who are likely to stick with their faith and grow as disciples are people who have been enabled to see their purpose and contribute to something bigger, rather than just being entertained. Children of all ages have their own gifts and passions and skills. Have you ever noticed the child who is always chatting or loves puzzles? Or the child who enjoys bringing their friends to church or who sings their heart out in worship? Each child has something unique to offer and we need to give them all the chance to discover their purpose in their group or church.
A good starting point is to talk to them about their passions and what they think and know they are good at. This could happen during a session, after church or through talking to parents. By identifying a child’s gifts or passions, you can then allow this young disciple to be empowered to give to their church or their church group in a way suitable to how God has created them. There are lots of elements to run a good children’s session: rooms need to set up; crafts counted out; refreshments prepared; children need to be welcomed; younger ones need help and support during the session; those who fall over need to be comforted. Children who decided to follow Jesus can learn to serve and use their skills or passions in their groups. It’s just a case of working out who can and wants to do what!
This shouldn’t be limited to children’s groups - children can be active members in the church space and service too. A 5-year-old at our church recently started helping on the welcome team with his parents. This was his choice; his parents bought into it and the children’s workers empowered him to make it happen. Once a month the child proudly dons the welcome host lanyard and smiles and says hello to those coming into church. He gives out leaflets, shows people to their seats, says hi to children and families as well as adults. He was known before to be a chatty, smiley welcoming boy even before he took on the role of a welcome host. He is being empowered to be a disciple.
The other avenue to explore is to talk to parents about how their child can join in with something outside the church. This could mean supporting a charity through giving money, giving to the poor or fighting against injustice. I heard a story of an aunt who had her nieces and nephews over to stay and took them out for one day to give out food and buy drinks for those who are homeless. The children learnt to interact and love those who are less fortunate than themselves. In the safety of adult company, the young disciples were taught how to love and serve just as Jesus did.
When a child comes to faith it’s time to celebrate well in a way that glorifies God. When the discipleship journey starts it must be about relationship, through adjusting teaching sessions so children encounter Jesus more. It’s about making connections with families to enable them to disciple. Finally it’s is about empowering children to give them purpose, discover their gifts and try them out in the children’s group, the church and the rest of the world.
Tory Tomlinson leads the children’s work at Holy Trinty Brompton.
